Hyper super global net dot hamms

dancing like a knuckleball

I owe some one an apology. When they read this they will know who they are. I am sorry for insinuating that some people do not want to move up and like staying here. It was meant as to some as this is what you want, and you want to do local sports. You really can't by going to a bigger market. This is what this person is good at in fact the best at and deserves a bigger market to prove it. This person has said that they are going to be looking to a bigger market. Congrats.

Now on to the business of the day:

Saw Spider-Man 2 today. I will not tell any plot points, though you may guess one in a bit. Great movie, go see it, better than the 1st with some real funny moments great writing and no real slow spots. OK so the next movies villians should be the return of the Green Goblin/introduction of the Hob-Goblin and Vemon or at least the introduction of Vemon at the end and the symbiote for most of the movie. Ya know the black suited Spider-Man.

Thats really all that is worhtwhile saying for now. Been a very boring person lately.

Last night I tried downloading MSN messenger and instead of messenger it was some porn thing were I could download the movie by clicking on them. You could see the cover of the video and other stuff. After it opened and I saw what it was I un-installed it and finally got the real Messenger. Which was weird cause I was clicking the download button on the MSN page.

Well thats its so here we go

Song of the Day: Audioslave "Like a Stone"
Thought O' Day: What would it be like to have some one like 'MJ' in my life. Also what would it be like to have super powers.

if it makes you happy

What makes you happy? Truely happy, not a fake happy but something that makes you just feel good all over inside and out.

For me its a few things, being with some one who likes being around me. Holding some you have feelings for. Being with friends. Waking up and realizing you can sleep in. Finding out some one may have feelings for me.

Please leave yours.

incomplete

woke up this morning and thought you were out of my head, realized you weren't and wished I was dead, your smell is in my sheets and mind, you were the best thing I ever did find.
Now you're gone and I am incomplete, I have nothing left I can't get to my feet, your name carved into my arm is all to remember you by, I want to know what I did to make you fly.
But you always came to me after something bad, its like I was a reoccuring fad, I don't want to need you, but I can't help it I do. I need to get you out of my head, keep you out of my bed, I can't take it any more, I will not open the door. You can't come in, you will no longer be my sin.
Now you're gone and I am incomplete, I have nothing left I can't get to my feet, your name carved into my arm is all to remember you by, I want to know what I did to make you fly.
You're a bad habit, something I need to kick, you're addictive You're wrong, YOU'RE FUCKING WITH MY LIFE!!!! GET OUT STAY OUT NEVER COME BACK!!!
You're gone but now I am complete, I don't need you to get to my feet, I scraped off the name on my arm, I'll remember you only with the scar, you left and I had nothing to with it.
STAY AWAY FAR FAR AWAY, STAY AWAY FAR FAR AWAY, STAY AWAY FAR FAR AWAY, (FADE)

Retraction stupid fucking news media

The earth quake wasn't in Iowa as stated before nope it was in Illinois. Fucking stupid media. They probabaly had some dumb-ass intern type it up and he thought "no one knows the the difference between Iowa and Illinois." They are a completly different set of FIBs, get it straight.

Anyway I can't sleep. I have known something now for about two years and this is the 1st time I have ever expressed it. My left ear is higher than my right ear. Yep thats right I am a freak. Now if only I could have a metal skeleton with three claws in each fore arm or be able to control metals with magnatism.

FUCK ME SANTA FUCK ME SANTA FUCK ME SANTA

I watched Bad Santa last night. It was quite entertaining and funny some laugh out loud moments. And Lauren Grahm, from The Gilmore Girls is in it. Mmmm she is very lovely woman, and its funny that she has a fetish for Santa. It makes me wanna dress like Santa just to see if I could get a hot women like that. Billy Bob Thorton is at his sleazy best. Mmmm Lauren Grahm.

Otherwise its been an interesting few weeks that day that I didn't work was was last Sunday, and right now I am going about 1 day a week with out working. 6 days a week of work. But hey I am the one signing up for the stuff so I have no problem with it. I kinda wish though that I was doing more. Also if you are in the Platteville area for the 4th listen to WPVL. With out being told I put together the music for the fireworks. Lots of good stuff. Ray Charles, Lee Greenwood, Creed, Breaking Point, Bruce Springsteen, John Mellencamp, The Godfather of Soul. Good stuff, with good transitions.

I guess an earthquake hit near here but maybe closer to Tino in Winona. I felt nothing, but it might explain why my mattress was further off the box spring than usual. Here is the link. Anyway if you do read this Tino did you feel it? Did any one feel it?

I am out now fuck off AND STOP PLATE TECTONICS!!!!!

watch your mouth young man

So Dubya won't critize Cheney for saying 'fuck' in congressional chambers. Here is the story.

Dubya has how ever been heard walking around using the adult word saying fuck fuck fuck fuck.

Rumors that he asked George senior what fuck meant are not true. Rumors that he asked his daughters are indeed true.

The sound of....

Squirrels thats right the sound of Squirrels got home last night and was mezmorized by the neighbors bug zapper. Then I saw and heard one of the coolest things ever. A squirrel went flying into the bug zapper. Ohh was that cool. Had a really wicked dream last night. I will summarize it. A co-worker went outside for a cigarette just as some Jehovah Witnesses came up to the building. The JW asked why he smoked but before he could answer the JW started fighting him. It was wicked weird. The JW end up killing him and the nailing him to the sign out front like Jesus Christ. I am telling ya man nachos and alcohol before bed really mess with the mind.

Song of the Day: Three Days Grace "Just Like You"
Thought O' Day: Is summer going to come? Cause I hope not cause I like this weather.

moron

Read this.


Now after you have read it all I have to say is COULDN"T YOU FIND A FUCKING GARDEN HOSE OR SHOWER!!! Dumb ass.

woo

Ya know how hard it is to find an open bar in P-ville at 3pm? I stopped at OT's closed, the Char Bar was open but decided that I really didn't feel like getting my ass kicked. The Pint was closed till 4 and I really didn't feel like waiting, Annex closed. So where to go? I remember doing remotes with Johnny from Henry's Pub. Its under the Round Tree Restuarant. Which is the Governer Dodge Hotel. Good food(nachos), good drinks (I had three J&C which were kinda strong and damn good), and good service(bar tender was talkative and cute). So if you get the chance check out Henry's Pub, across from McDonald's in P-ville. Good stuff.

Jay did it

Since Jay put what he is looking for in a woman I will too. The following is from my match.com profile.

breathing not insane non smoker understanding (ie pschycologist) can never have appeared in a 'girls gone wild' video. I hate those. Basic stuff I would think. Expressive eyes are best. The ones that glow and glimmer are so damn cute. If you have ever seen Kristin Kreuk (Lana from Smallville on WB) Heather McQuaid a model, or Cathrine Zeta Jones' eyes you know what I mean. Almond shaped eyes ohh i just melt. Body type really doesn't matter much, can't be twiggy and can't be bigger than me (and I am pretty big) I like curves, soulful bright shimmering eyes, and a great smile are what make a woman beautiful. confidence in yourself but not hung up on yourself. Some one who doesn't need me but wants me. In all honestly I want some one I can talk and be close to in all sence of the word. I am not out for one nights stands and am I not out just trying to seduce you into bed then leave after a little action I am not the country of France, it seems hard to believe but am a guy not out to get as much tail as I can. I want some one who doesn't mind me coming up from behind them and wrapping my arms around them and giving them a hug and kiss on the neck whether in public or private. Someone who knows the difference between heavy petting induced by alcohol and true affection. Some one who doesn't mind me making them dinner or desserts, I like to cook I just don't like to eat it, it makes me feel guilty some times. Some one who is comfortable in their own skin and is comfortable around people, because I am not and well when some else is comfortable it kinda brings me out. Finally someone who wants to be around me and likes me warts and all. . Thank you for your time and if you read the entire 'wish list' thank you. Also if you have made it this far I'll let you know that I have never been with a women, in that way, yes a "v" word. I would prefer to wait for love.

I'M THE FUCKING VICE PRESIDENT MUTHERFUCKER THATS WHO!!!!!

More yahoo news.

Cheney Utters 'F-Word' in U.S. Senate?

Geez ya think the all blood diet is finally getting to him? Or is it the fact that he has to deal with the dumbest sumbitch on the planet.

But I do wonder would Sam Jackson ever be elected Vice President? "I'M NOT YELLING. THAT'S HOW I TALK BITCH!!!!" "MMMMM HMMMMMM THATS GOOD MUTHERFUCKING BEER!!!!!!"

I even know this is wrong

Judge Suspected of Masturbating in Court

New Video

Just saw the new video for Evenecence called "Everybody's Fool" If you like Amy Lee see it. She dons some wigs and looks really different.

Another One

Got another blog up and running. Its called Who's This Fucking Guy It has its own link on the side. Its for really pissy rants that may not fit in with the family friendly page this one is.

Thank you Management

Take it off take it all off

A take off on the survey that Brandon, and Mike have.
Just answer the questions in a comment. Its the Dirty Bakers Dozen.

1. Why are you here?
2. Who the fuck are you?
3. And I should care why?
4. Have you ever drank with me?
5. In the grand scheme of things, would you rather have a puppy or kitten?
6. Have you ever seen me necked?
7. When was the last time you saw me?
8. Was a drunk, getting there, drinking?
9. If you could give me one symbloic thing what would it be you fucking cheapskate?
10. True or True: I like women.
11. Do I have any tattoos?
12. Do you have any you would like to show me? (This is only for women) wink wink nudge nudge.
13. If you could ask my opinion on one thing what would it be dumb ass?

Thanks for taking the quiz now fuck off.

Thats a buzz kill

This is kinda for Jay. I was checking out my match.com account tonight and checking this thing called physical attraction match, where after you take a test they tell you what kinda of women you like physically. Well I had already done that so I clicked on send me matches, and i looked at a lot of them and they had two meters one for how attractive I should find her and how attracted she would be to my type. There were 4 level, not at all, somewhat, pretty well, and very much. On 16-17 I was not at all on the other 1 I was somewhat, geez that makes me feel real good the ones I find attractive don't find me attractive. Also in the "I give up catagory" Maxim has a survey of women and 47% say that to get their attention you should show off your sence of humor. Problem is almost no women sit around me, and I don't exactly go seeking them out with my sence of humor. I am buried so damn deep I should just roll over and dig myself that way it would be quicker.

I survived anorexia

Mary Kate (the ugly one) has anorexia. WHY DID NO ONE SEE THIS!!!! Her career is ruined now, her movies will only be straight to video. What a shame. Ashley Olson however will become the plucky one who over comes the shame of her sister to star in such future hits as "Cold Shoulder" a story of a plucky girl who helps her sister over come a crack habit. Katie Holmes plays her older slutty sister. Heath Ledger plays Marty the fish out of water Aussie doctor who helps people over come addictions. Of course no one will forget Ashley Olson as Mary Katherine in the action movie "Two Shots of Evil." Ashley plays a nun who fights evil when not punishing poor catholic school boys. She is also the gym teacher and has lots of heart to heart talks with the catholic school girls in her office which has a picture window facing the shower. Jake Gyllenhaal plays her crime fighting friend the Pius but alcoholic Father Jones, an excommunicated priest who now needs Sister Mary Kathrine's help to cure his Vampirism caused by his excommunication. Hillary Duff & Lindsay Lohan have guest appearances as two Catholic school girls who get into a towel slapping fight in the shower. Also guest appearances by Playboy Playmates, Victoria's Secrets models, and SI swimsuit models as the Catholic school girls. And who would forget her comedic turn in "Of Two Minds" as she plays a nuclear scientist who accidentally splits herself into two separate people. Ashley plays both rolls. Alexa Vega and Daniel Radcliffe play her opposite lovers. Anthony Stewart Head plays her gifted yet dense employer.

Also rumors of Ashley calling Mary Kate a fat pig are at press time unsubtanciated. However Mary Kate did call Ashley fat after Ashley ate an entire soft pretzel.

Song of the Day: Full Devil Jacket "Wanna Be a martyr"
Thought O' Day: So does this mean that Mary Kate wasn't blowing her paychecks on candy bars?

PS. By the way Kyle Cooper is still single ladies. Now you can fuck off though.

Just thought I'd tell ya

Victoria's Secret is having its semi-annual swim suit sale on now. So if you are a young lady whom I would find cute I could buy you some. Of cource there will be no thong buying because well Mike Lyons told me he wears one and thats just wrong.

The ad has Giselle B on it. DAMN YOU LEO D'CAPRIO, 1st TITANIC AND NOW THIS!!!! DIE LEO DIE!!!!

It leans to the left thank you very much

OK so I stopped at OTs for a few drinks 3 total and I played some NFL Blitz with Rob Callahan. I have not played that game in ages it took some time to get back to the feel. I bought The Sausage a drink and merriment was had by all. And I saw my cousin Kim.

After leaving I stopped at Walmart for some hair dye. On my way out and back to my car I noticed this dumb fuck getting out of his SUV, why did this draw my attention? Cause he was climbing out through the window next to the cart return area. There was no car on his right he could have just back out and tried again instead he climbed out of SUV's window and used the cart return stations bar's as he ladder. It was funny though to see him slip and fall. he he.

Pissed in the yard again. That fucking broadleaf weed will die sooner or later. Or at least those ferns around it will.

Single?

I am told Kyle Cooper is single. To set up a date call 1-800-883-WPVL between 9-2pm every day. MUST BE FEMALE!!!!! Please be hot as well. As ages 23-40 welcome, must be this tall to ride.

Feelin better

Feelin a little better mentally.

But now if you would all induldge me I would like to send out a big "FUCK YOU" to California. I am sorry for some of this but not much. Also Mike I am sorry for you too. Read here why.

ish

Been feeling pretty used and unliked in recent days. Kinda like I can't do as well as others like. While that doesn't bother me all that much what does bother me is that I am not doing as well as I would like to do, I am not living up to the bargain I made with myself. That's a bad feeling to have, that you aren't living up to your own side of things. I admit that my standards for myself are a lot higher than other people have of me but they need to be. Almost no one has ever taken me seriously, I have always had to prove myself twice as worthy for a lot of things. I know I am never going to be worthy where I work now, because no one wants to leave. Those that do sports know that in bigger markets they lose the sports and other have roots here and don't want to uproot them. Its not a glass ceiling here its a hydraulic press that's pushing down. One thing I dislike about being here is that no one has goals for a larger market. Another thing I have a problem wit is the demographic of where I work, I can't break with some of my kind of crude humor or bash religous fanatics or have fun cause that 85 year old pissy old bitty will call and be all pissed. I hate having this toned down me. I want out just so I can be out.

I like P-ville, I do my only beef with the place is that people know me here they know me from Boscobel and for some reason, and for some reason they think that I am some kind of dumb jock who only drank and slept with lots of women. They are surprised to learn that Hamms (sorry to use the third person here but very few people ever remembered Chad Henneman) has a college degree and has never been with a woman. That and I wasn't a jock I was a kid who played sports but didn't make it my life goal. That and in high school I rarely if ever drank, one I never had a car to go to said parties, two I was never invited, three I never thought a bunch of high schoolers getting drunk on beer while just sitting around was that worthy of my presence, since I can't stand the taste of beer any way and the conversations usually revolved around who was fucking who and who was pissed about it.

Something else I have noticed as of late is that a lot of people are down, almost depressed like around here. No one really seems to have any pep, or piss and vinegar. This kind of feeling I associate with late winter and being cooped up not with early summer and being able to get out.

I also have noticed that some people run down other people behind their backs but are all warm and fuzzy to them to their faces, actually I have seen this since high school. If some one wants to run down some one else in front of me, I don't run to that person and tell them, hell I don't even tell that other person if they ask. Its not place to say "well ya know Yadir, Hussein thinks you are an ass." I have no business telling others what others think of them. Unless its good then I will say it. If its bad then its not worth it to tell others. I don't think its my place to be a third person stress carrier. I don't mind being a 1st person or second person carrier but not a third person.

I know any one who has read this before is sick of me saying this but I am tired of being alone. I am tired of not trying, but the only places that I frequent all that the women want there is to hook up with some random guy have a one nighter then maybe think about seeing him downtown again. Thats not me. Of cource its not me to really just strike up a conversation with any one not sitting with me either so ohh well. Sooner or later I guess maybe I should try and talk to women and not be so shy around them, but I guess its better to be perceived as jerk then to open my mouth and remove all doubt. Thank you now fuck off.

Song of the Day: Stereomud "Pain"
Thought O' Day: See above and you tell me.

fun fun

Spyder Kid posted this on WSUP.org and I find 124-125-126 to be my favorites.

John Stossel can rot on hell

As the title implies I dislike John Stossel, who you may ask? That prick on ABC's 20/20 who always comes up with these 'hard news biting stories that reveal the seedy underbelly' of something. The last time I saw him was about 18 months ago when he did a story on how milk producers are suing people who produce soy 'milk.' He kept siding with the soy people saying maybe the milk producers should change their name. That pissed me off to no end. The next time I saw him was last night and thankfully I only saw him for like 10 minutes. He was supposedly debunking the eat only McDonalds and you gain weight myth. He had the maker of 'Super Size Me' Morgan Spurlock on and showed him video of people who also ate nothing but McDonalds for 30 days. These people lost weight, and both said that they work out regularly. Morgan Spurlock, pointed that out that these people work out and he did not. Mr. Spurlock also pointed out that a large majority of Americans that eat at McDonalds do not work out, that is why they gain weight. But Stossel ever the asshole pointed out that they lost weight. Yeah John you said that already. Dildo. Again Mr. Spurlock pointed out that they worked out and he didn't, and again Stossel said but they lost weight don't you think that you are skewing your results? Ya know sometime I truely hate the media, even though I am a part of it.

Are you?

The Final Judgement is Coming are you Ready? Will you Pass the Inspection?

ARHHH

Ben Sheets will get a hit this year I predict.

Maxim

Maxim says "it the best thing to happen to men since women." Is the worst thing to happen to men also women? Is there anything that we worry/think about more? Please discuss.

g-mail

I guess I to have a g-mail invite who wants it? You want it you know it other wise you wouldn't be dressing that way... wait umm ohh shit. I do have an invite though.

Paid

Went to Lancaster today and paid my ticket. Ya know they shouldn't have a bar (Doolittle's) on the square next to the courthouse. I stopped in had a Jack and Coke and a Jager Bomb then asked the bartender to change my ten into ones and quarters. I then took the bills rolled then in some spilt liquer crumbled them up and went to my car where I had an old taco bell bag. I put the money $6 in quarters and 4 singles in the bag then head over to pay the fine. Its paid. They have their blood money. Then I drove home and got behind this guy who was actually doing the speed limit. uhg. I finally got to pass him in the slow traffic right section. I only went 60 after I passed him but still I don't like the whole speedlimit I go it thing.

Please?

Can some one please tell me why men are so smitten with Cameron Diaz?

SQUEAL!!!!

Got pulled over today right by the Platteville Aquatic Center. I was apparently speeding, I might have been as its 15 right through there, and I wasn't even on the gas. I think I was going 20. Damn speed traps. I wasn't wearing my seatbelt either. I got into an arguement with the cop, Bruce W. Buchholtz about the speed limit signs. He almost gave me a ticket for the speeding, instead he just gave me the seatbelt ticket. Less than a block from work. You could look out the studio A window and maybe see me. The satilite dish blocks alot of the view. My complaint is that when you turn off Water Street on to that street with the softball and soccer parks that the sign is way to close to the intersection. He pulled me over on Pitt street. Same place where Mark The Shark got picked up. He is still pissed. I think he is challeging the patriotness of said speeding ticket. And just minutes ago I went to the front desk and there was some one pulled over infront of the building by another cop. Speed trap by PVL avoid Will Robinson AVOID. Cops are out busting speeders. I should go and pay this at Lancaster today and pay in nickles and dimes. Or charge them gas, and if no one is there have a sit in. Dern Cops. I would say damn but at least he didn't give me a speeding ticket.

Dan Moris

I am betting Dan Moris would love this. Its tranformers break dancing.

Found it at CollegeHumor.com

Name those lyrics

1. No remorse No repent We don't care what it meant Another day Another death Another sorrow Another breath No remorse No repent We don't care what it meant Another day Another death Another sorrow Another breath METALLICA

2. Welcome to where time stands still no one leaves and no one will Moon is full, never seems to change just labeled mentally deranged Dream the same thing every night I see our freedom in my sight No locked doors, No windows barred No things to make my brain seem scarred METALLICA

3. Mama they try and break me Still they try and break me 'Scuze me while I tend to how I feel These things return to me that still seem real Now deservingly this easy chair But the rocking stopped by wheels of despair METALLICA

4. Fuck it all! fuck this world! Fuck everything that you stand for! Don’t belong! don’t exist! Don’t give a shit! Don’t ever judge me! SLIPKNOT

5. Something takes a part of me. Something lost and never seen. Everytime I start to believe, Something’s raped and taken from me... from me. KORN

6. Pull me out of body don’t want it don’t want in, Feeble frail and rotting descending I’m lost in, A structure that’s collapsing don’t want it cast into, Maker take the body don’t want it wants me MUDVAYNE

7. I can’t imagine To be like you All the pain and the suffering ya put me through SEVENDUST

8. Denial seems it had to come Relied on me to say it all Denial has left you all alone SEVENDUST

9. Twisting everything around that, you say...yeah!. Smack me in my mouth 200 times every other day. Rag me, I don’t hear you anymore, not yet. Find out what it means to me, I don’t know who you are GODSMACK

10. I’m not the one who’s so far away When I feel the snake bit enter my veins. Never did I wanna be here again, And I don’t Remember why I came. GODSMACK

I carved your name into my arm

Got in my car and there was a dead fly on the dashboard. Nothing big then I started it up, and I noticed there was a mosquito in the car. I tried to kill it but couldn't. That fucking thing bit me about 6 times and now I itch in places. Fucking mosquitoes, do they have a useful purpose in this world? Did they ever? We need bats lots of bats to eat these damn things. OK now fuck off and don't get bit.

Did I get so drunk I woke up in Phoenix?

The current temp out side the bathroom window at Casa de Jamon is 93, outside the front door in the shade it is 89, outside the back door it is 90. Casa de Jamon is freaking sweltering. Weather.com says its 81 feels like 84. WISC says its 81. Something ain't fucking right right now.

Pistons won the NBA Championchip. I can say I honestly didn't care about the NBA this year or last year. No one can hit a 15 foot jumper any more. No one plays good defence outside the Pistons and Pacers yet teams still only score 85 points a night. I will admit to wanting the Lakers to win cause they have Karl Malone and he is my favorite player of all time, since I read an SI for Kids article about him way back in 4th grade. But I was cheering against them cause they are the Lakers and have "Hot" Kobe "Beef Injection" Bryant. I never liked that egotistical ass. And recently with some LA writers saying he is like Superman for going from CO to LA is super-human. Hey he is on trial for rape and you are glamorizing this? God damn. If it were his father who died and he was doing this no problem call him a super hero but he is on trial and could spend some serious time in jail if convicted. Don't hero worship those who must live up to their mistakes.

Slight head-ache this morning but I think thats cause I hit my head on bed post when I got up.

Song of the Day: X-Ecutioners '(even) More human than human'
Thought O' Day: Really?

watch all the idiots follow me

The temptations of peer pressure are so great.

For those wondering but most know AMS is Amanda M Sorenson. I do not know what the M stands for nor will I ever find out because I am trying to never talk to her again. Except in X-mas, and birthday cards. I just have an unrequited crush on her.

I am really drunk right now. Should not have driven home but if I wrapped myself around a power pole not too many people would care. I am like the US government I have no exit strategy. I am amazed I can type this well this drunk and blurry eyed. The blurry eyes only happened when I got home, right as I was pissing in the front yard. Had to stop and get some milk and bubble mailers for resume cds.

Not that I will ever get anything other than rejection letters. I mean I am not even good enough to be considered as a possiblity if an opening came up in PVL.

So drunk I almost started hitting on women tonight. ALMOST.

Head ache starting to set in time for bed.

Song of the Day: Puscifer featuring Maynard of tool"REV 20 22"
Thought O' Day: Does any one really care?

sez you

So I am watching one of my Buffy the Vampire Slayer DVD's today and its the one where Buffy drinks straight from the bottle. After each drink she'd make a blahk sound like me drinking gin and chasing it with extra dry gin. Blahk.

Then I thought of Alex and his kitten cause a bunch of demons were having a back alley poker game with kittens. Its not real but its written like it could be.

I took some loose coins to the bank today and cashed them in. about a 1/4 of a long island iced glass.

Did any one watch this years 'real world' in San Diago? Cause that Frankie chick is one messed up drama queen. She needs some serious help. That and I can't stand her but thats another story. I like the Jamie girl on there I think she is cute.

Song of the Day: Smokey Robinson "going to a go-go"
Thought O' Day: What does it take?

What I am feeling

Feeling pretty freakin' depressed, just one of those feelings that I am not good enough for anything and won't amount to much. Its a horrible feeling to have.

So to make me feel better I will rank some of my favorite female accents. Cause well ya know that us Midwestners don't have a accent der ya know.

1) British. Keira Knightly, Kate Beckensale, and Liz Hurley. They could all talk dirty to me.

2) Southern. Nichole Whitehead. Disclaimer: When its sexy its sexy, when its dumb its really dumb.

3) Slight NE accent. Not entirely the pahk the cah in the yahd thing but near it.

4) Dutch. Cathrine Zeta-Jones. The melting of butter happens with these voices.

5) Russian. OK so who hasn't thought about getting a Russian mail order bride and not teaching her English.

Song of the Day: Iron Butterfly 'In the Garden of Eden' or its real title "Ina-gadda-div-ida' LONG version
Thought O' Day: Does any one else remember that girl from NBS two years ago who I was talking to? She was bi-lingual, wanted a job in TV, incredibly beautiful, and ACTUALLY talked to me.

A WORTHWHILE QUIZ

I scored an 8 out of 12 which will surprise some of you. Click here to take the test.

And now on the high dive Tino Kaltsas

Don't laugh that could actually have happened. Greece is holding the Summer Olympics and the IOC is taking Americans with Greek heritage and putting them together on teams. I read this in a Sports Illustrated article. 90% of the baseball team is American and 95% of the softball team is too. So I am just wondering if maybe Alex was contacted to be maybe a fencer and Tino to be a diver. THERE'S AN IMAGE FOR YOU!!! TINO IN A SPEEDO!!!! Sorry guys no LAN games at the Olympics, no Final Fantasy either. It would be interesting though to see the Kaltsas boys competing in some summer Olympic event.

My endings need beginnings. Makes ya wonder. I wonder is it the pain of life that makes us go on? Or I guess the perceived pain. I really can't bitch. I know that my life is pretty decent, I have a job, I have a place to live and I have food to eat. It does put things in perspective. Not having a girlfriend can actually be good, no worries about how she might be trying to break up with you, kill you, or if aren't treating her right. Ahh the cynic in me is alive and well.

Went to the farm today for Jaden's birthday party. It is kinda un nerving to see a three year old running around not wearing cloths. That's what she was doing almost all day. It was even more unnerving to see her wearing only a bike helmet. I couldn't help but think of Special ED. She finally put on some shorts and we had a water balloon fight. My older brother nailed me with one that was full of hot water. I hit him with one that almost icy cold. Then I fell asleep for 2 hours in a chair. mmm sleep is damn good.


Song of the Day: Offspring (Can't Get My) Head Around You
Thought O' Day: Will Jaden have a dad? By that I mean will John grow up or will Stacey find someone else.

Lac DeSleep

So I guess today is the Olsen Twins birthday they are now 18. That officailly makes them to old for the Du-Sausage. The only reason I know this is that it popped up on my AIM messenger whats happening page. It really doesn't matter I never much cared for either, I don't find either to sexy or hot. Give me Lindsay Lohan or Hillary Duff as my underagers of choice. God that sound sick... Wait I am a sick person.

I watched the Buffy the Vampire Slayer episode called "One more with feeling." It is a musical episode. I thought it was incredible. They all did great jobs signing. That and you get to see Alyson Hanigan making out with another girl.

Sleep has been allusive lately, been staying up to much i guess. I wish I had some one to keep me up though that would be nice. Some warm body who I happened to find cute and worthwhile to talk to. Though this might be a turn off to them, I woke up this morning and my pillows were soaked in sweat, yet the rest of my bed was ahhh bone dry. My head sweats when I have nightmares and I guess I had one with out knowing it.

I also realized yesterday that I was slamming my hands into the steering wheel, screaming, and banging my head to Slipknot while in my car. I usually only do that to Metallica and Sevendust.

Also just for the hell of it at PVL this morning I am playing Kenny Rodgers & The 1st Edition "Just Dropped In (to see what condition my condition was in)" Its in the Big Lebowski where The Dude is tripping out. I kinda think I should get some strobe lights.

Song of the Day: Stevie Wonder "Higher Ground" or the darkenss wait no bubble hates that song. And I suggested a different song there.
Thought O' Day: Is it karma?

If I ever

I know I am judgemental, I know that I hate a lot of things, but if start saying that I can't believe I am better than my past please some one make me put my drink down and then slap me.

In other news
I scored a 81% on the "How Wisconsin Are You?" Quizie! What about you?

Change is constant

DId any one know that The Boomtown Grill is no longer? Yep it once was on 151 but now its gone replaced by something called Reba J's Bar-b-q Ribs.

Also today I shaved a little. I had been not shaving for about a week but decided to shave the neck area and the side of my chin. So that leaves me with a chin dimple goatee a slight mustache and sidburns that come down to the side of my chins. Then with that facial hair and my black super-maw t I went and got a barbie phone. You get some looks when you look like me buying that.

Song of the Day: N.E.R.D. "She likes to dance"
Thought O' Day: Did Anna Nichole get smarter as she got thiner?

The place to be.

The gov's mansion was nice. Getting lost on the way there sucked. damn road construction taking the street signs down. We couldn't tell where we were supposed to turn cause the street we were on was ripped up and there were no street signs on our side. So we did get lost ever so slightly. So we got to the Mansion and well we were like 20 minutes early so we decided to find a bar and get a drink. Well we get out on Lakewood I beleive and there are these two bars we went to the one that smelled better. MMM fish fry. So after a jack and coke we go back to the mansion. Now we can get in. Now little back story they needed the names of all those coming so that they could do background checks on us. Well the person that Johnny e-mailed our names to was Heather McKinney. Who? Yeah that was my 1st thought but she replied saying that she knew me from UWP. I am thinking ohh shit, I mean I am horrible with names but remember faces very well. Unless you and I drank together, you were a broadcaster (which kinda go together) or you are the bartender at OT's chances are i don't remember your name. So we get inside and I am expecting to see some one that I know inside the door I don't see any one I should know. I also signed the guest book so if I need an alibi I got one. So then Heather comes up to me and says you don't remember me do you. Well no not the name, but I remember the face. Heather is a cute blond with styled hair and a very bubbly personality. She grabs my cheeks and says you don't remember me. She grabbed my face cheeks not my butt cheeks Bubble. I remember the face from classes but because I never was in any groups with her I never really had to learn her name. Cute girl though. So me and Page go to 'case the place' and then grab some grub. Johnny then pointed it out to me that we were eating off gold leaf plates with plastic forks. We talked to Heather again then it was off to Red Lobster. I had some platter with shrimp lobster crab legs and taters. I also had this coconut colada concotion that was quite good. I like coconut drinks. Page got a margarita that was like a gallon big. Then it was time to go home. When I got home I decided to put the new RAM in, but i didn't get the right order so now I have to ship it back. I went to gateway.com and put in my serial number and they told me the exact one I needed so I think I am gonna go that route. Ithank you for your info on crucial.com but I think that until I know what kind of computer I have I will try to keep it as simple as possible, but once I do getmy own comp then crucial will be used.

Yesterdays song of the day: Anything by RUSH
Thought O' Yesterday: IS she seeing any one?

Really?

So apparently Dubya might use Ronny in some cam-pain ads. Dubya also trying to use Reagan's death by trying to make it a 'three' man ticket with him, Dick 'I am not a robot' Cheney and and the late Ronny Ray-gun this has upset some Reaganites and other conseveratives. Now i really see no problem with this I mean there already is a dead guy on the ticket in Cheney.

OK how about some slogans and bumper stickers "Vote for the idiot, Zombie, and Reagan." or "Only one of these guys has to breath and he chokes on pretzals" "Hey at least Reagan had an excuse." "Bush: Now he's ripping off Reagan." "Two of them sleep in coffins, the other sleeps with a night light." I am shamelessly stealing this from The Boondocks, "Bush: Isn't pretty close good enough?"

OK so if anyone else can come up with others feel free.

Late nights, early mornings.

It has been brought to my attention that all I use this blog for is bitching about the world. (pleace pause here for about two minutes)

OK so would any one want me to change the way I blog?

Ohhh wait I don't care, I am still gonna bitch on my blog.

So my previous post was last night some time around 2:30am or so. Now I am blogging again at 9:30am. Yep I am at work. Kyle got sick and called to see if I could fill in for him and here I am. I will have no problems with this unless I start getting stupid people calls.

OK I am off, no need to say fuck off cause well I kinda would like people to talk to today.

You can not destroy what you did not create

So after work I got to OT's and think I am just gonna get one maybe two drinks and sit by myself. Well that didn't happen. I sat in the Johnny Page 'Doc' Memorial Stool and had a few drinks sitting next to a bubbly young blond who looked 16 and was pretty cute. So I keep drinking and Kevin, is feeding me the drink of choice, side note is it bad when you know the bartending staff by name? The cute blond then goes behind the bar and makes me a drink which was Jack Daniels with a Splash of Coke and I told her it was the best drink i have ever had. She then says how she is having after bar at 480 Water St. Damn if only. So then just before bar time these two guys who are just messing around, get into a wrestling match and the bald dude ends up slicing the back of his head open, there is a pool of blood on the floor and they stop and get some rags. The guy then gets taken out of the bar to go for stitches. Then four young ladies show up and and Kevin says that they can't get shots its after bar time and one girl goes 'if I show you my boobs will you let us have shots. But I will only show the bartender' Well myself and Andrew start talking about how we are all bartenders and while I am looking at Andrew she flashes her boobies. I missed Boobies. damn it. Andrew sad they were nice yet small but still nice. Then Kevin starts saying we all need to leave and the cute blond says I need your help I need you to finish this drink and hand me her drink so I start sucking it down but I keep getting ice in teeth and can't drink it. So she hands it to Andrew he makes a good dent in it then she drinks some then hands it back to me and says I have to finish it. So I do. And now I am feeling it. the room is not supposed to tilt is it? Damn it I missed Boobies.

It comes in threes

RIP Ronald Reagan
RIP Ray Charles
RIP (someone else)
So who will be the next person to die? Since we have a political figure and an entertainer we now need some one that was an author or something. Is it time to start the "Creeping Death" chant?

So i am watching the MTV Movie Awards and a commercial pops up for Gene Simmons solo album. Now I know some people will love this album just because he is affilated with KISS and people love KISS, (I might be the same way with anything Metallica) but really when was the last time KISS did anything worth while? Is Gene Simmons still relavent? The songs that they started playing were just horrible. ASSHOLE? Thats the name of a song and the album. A remake of Prodigy's 'Firestarter' ohh come on. Gene put the makeup play some shows and shut up. I mean every time in the last 8 years that Gene has opened his mouth nothing but dumb come out. He is egotistical and I just dislike that. He just rubs me the wrong way. Maybe thats the reason I am not a huge KISS fan like Bubble is. Also Gene Simmons dressed as a pimp is just so fucking stupid. That and he isn't all that good looking anyway. Hell no one in KISS is with out their make-up.

I read an article today about Ronny Ray-Gun and how he completly missed the boat on AIDS. AIDS didn't break until 1981 according to the article and RAY-Gun didn't address it till 1987. And according to Gary Bauer, Reagan's domestic policy advisor, spending on AIDS research increased during Reagan's years. Well of cource they did. cause it didn't exist before hand. Thats kind of like a couple with out kids saying that after they had a kid that spending went up on diapers. Well of cource it did cause they were spending $0 before on it.

Ohh and I would like to tell ya more but due to my beliefs I will not. Ohh wait I am not John Ashcroft and I don't have a cross shoved up my ass. OK so I don't mean to offend any Christians out there. But I DID mean to offend those christians that are not open minded and are stuck in their ways because thats how Christ would want them to act.

One more thought. I know i have said this before but what is the hang up with people caring about Paris Hilton? She has no talent, I don't find her attractive, she is rail thin and I don't care for that, she is un-talented, dumb, and untalented. The only reason people care for her is that she is rich and parties alot. Well hell give me that much money and i can do that to. Also I saw her on the MTV Movie Awards and her face looks like it has had some work done and is puffy and fat.

OK HAMMS HAS SPOKEN!!!! Now fuck off.

Song of the Day: The Darkness "I believe in a thing called love"
Thought O' Day: Am I alone by thought or design?

Weird sleeping

West coast road trips really mess you up sleep wise. Been getting to work 8pm and getting out around 1:30am. Now that is usually my drinking hours when/if I go out. But this is just plain messing me up. And I am have been having really weird dreams. One entailed me be wanted for the murder of some one under the alias of James Masterson. Another involved me driving a car all around Dubuque with AMS, and a third involved me killing vampires. The Vampire's one was actually kinda good. The others were plain screwy. Well at least this is the last time they will go out to the west coast so woo. I think I am gonna go take a nap. again.

Cranked!!!

I just got cranked. Ok so either I got cranked by an incredibly unimaginative and stupid person or that person was in fact really stupid. Now you may be asking what was the crank? Some yahoo called and asked at 8:27pm for two Culvers, 2 Avalons and a Bishops. Now if you are familiar with WPVL you may know that on Saturday mornings WPVL FM does a thing called The Bargin Market. Where local business will give us coupons for about 75 cents on the dollar. I say Excuse me, and he repeats 2 Culvers, 2 Avalons and a Bishops. Asked again and he said well don't you guys do that. I said yes we do but we only do it Saturday mornings at 8:30. Ohh well you'll hear from me then. ahh jeez.

Went to Madison for some wings today, and right now I am at work doing the Brewer game and I heard Kent Summerfeld for only the 3rd time in my life. OK fourth, I talked to him last year at the afflaites day. So why did I hear Kent? Apperently Bob and Jim were both stuck in an elevator. I'd like to be stuck in an elevator with some people but neither of those two even make the top 25. Here are my top 10 people to be stuck in a elevator with.
1. AMS
2. Cathrine Zeta-Jones
3. LH
4. Heather McQuaid
5. Jesus Christ
6. Metallica
7. Heidi Klum
8. Brett Favre
9. Lindsay Lohan
10. Karen McDougal

Song of the Day: Nine Inch Nails "Closer" "Into the Void"
Thought O' Day: How long has it been?

Its Over

Brewers Win. Scotty 'Po' with the RBI double in the top of the 17th drives in Craig Counsell from 1st. Brewers' pitchers gave up no runs in 17 innings. Time of game 4:46. Its 1:57 and i am ready for bed. Good thing they won. It would have been an even lonelier drive home for me. Final: Brewers 1 Angels 0 in 17 innings.

I am hourly right?

I am currently between the 15th and 16ths hours of work today. It is currently 1:09 am CDT I have been here since 8pm and before that I was here from 9am to 7pm. Brewers and Angels are tied 0-0 in the top of the 15th. Brett Favre is batting. OK its Geoff Jenkins but they do look alike. I really want the Brewers to win, cause Ben Sheets allowed only 1 hit in 9 innings. BUT who ever wins will deserve it and i will be thankful. Jenkins just struck out for the 6TH TIME in one game. That ties a modern day record for K's in a game. That does make me wonder where do they get K out of Strike Out? I had wanted to go for a drink but I don't they will still be open on a Tuesday night. Brewers as a team have struck out 22 times in tonights game. But the Angels at the time I am writing this are hitting .045. Thats bad. Jeff Bennett is pitching. This guy doesn't bend the bill of his cap and has a cool goat tee and shaved head. He looks like a guy you don't wanna screw with. I am listening to the new Slipknot and its pretty good. Corey Taylor did a good job with the lyrics. Kinda of a mesh of Stone Sour and old slipknot with the leaning toward Radio freindly Stone Sour. OK Thats my piece, now fuck off.

Song of the Day: Linkin Park "In the End"
Thought O' Day: Is it good when the only thing someone has ever gotten you is insane?

Still it goes on top of the 16th is next. Now its 1:21 am.

Could they?

I pose this question to any one; Could the Green Bay Packers playing a game of softball offence vs defence out draw the Milwaukee Brewers playing the Chicago Cubs with both games at Miller Park?

I guess it is true

So Dubya's lawyers aka SATAN and his minions, have said that Bush is above the laws of the US and The UN. To affectively govern this war Bush can not be tied down by such minor laws as those reguarding torture. To read the article click it. Now go fuck off and Vote Kerry.

Need help

I need your help people where is a good place to buy some RAM for my computer.

musings of a damaged mind

So I this Friday night I am going to the Gov's mansion for something or other. Its me and Page going. So you know that we might get kicked out or banned or the place may burn down. The burning down would be a complete accident. Page is kind of clumsy and I lean on the wrong things. Remember WKOW 27 a few years ago? So it would be one of those things were we try to put it out but it gets worse.

I think I am going insane, but then again if you think you are you aren't because you still have your faculties about you. But its been the last few days when I drive and I am listening to a CD I swear I can hear my cell phone ringing. I swear I can hear it. But its like its off in the distance and I can barely hear it. Its starting to freak me out.

I am becoming increasingly more and more disgusted with cam-pain commercials. Congress should enact a law that no commercial can be aired until August. Actually how about not until November. That way you weed out those who shouldn't be voting anyway. God Damn hippies. The only commercials that should air is the date that you can go vote.

I am also for some reason pissed off at the west coast. 1) you know you were moving into a fucking desert, don't complain now that you don't have any water. 2) Because you live in a fucking desert, you expect that when a fire breaks out that all that lush green stuff shouldn't burn. By lush green stuff I mean stuff that is so dry if you brushed by it while wearing corderoy pants it would instantly burst into flames. 3) You know native american indians who lived where you do never had this problem with HUGE forest fires because they knew that when one popped up you let it burn its cource getting rid of all the stuff that could burn THAT year. not by stopping the fire and letting all the stuff that could burn mount up year after year. 4) Gas prices on the west coast deserve to be high. I was watching MSNBC and they interviewed some jackass 17 year old kid who was driving an SUV they asked him about his driving patterns and he said now that he was out of highschool for the summer he was driving like 8-9 hours a day. When the reporter asked why the kid replied that was what he did he drove around cause there was nothing else to do. I slapped myself in the forehead and asked why not get that little fuck a bike. They then asked a 22 year old black woman and she said that she commutes 3 hours to work. TO WORK NOT ROUND TRIP!!! She said that she does like the community where she works but wouldn't want to live there because its not where she lives now. Some people should be slapped and beaten. 5) Finally those fuckers think that its just them and the east coast and that there is nothing in between. Apparently the Mid-west is really just a big sink hole that no one cares about. Wisconsin gets nailed by winter storms and is under 12 feet of snow and it really doesn't matter cause New York and DC and Boston just got three inches each and Christ they just can't function.

I have my resume and such posted on Monster.com and after it only being up for two days I got two e-mails. I do find that a little odd. But right now anything would be appealing besides this dead end go no where job I am in now.

Song of the Morning: Wilson Picket "Mustang Sally" it reminds me of strippers.
Thought O' Morning: My goodness it is gonna be a hot one today.

The Top Ten Conservative Idiots

Check it out. IDEEEIOTS

Lars kicked out of Metallica?!?!

Even though some people would like to see that it didn't happen. Nope. While on tour in Europe Lars had to go to the hospital for what is being called a medical emergency. Metallica with out their drummer kept going getting Dave Lombardo of Slayer, Joey Jordison of Slipknot, and Lars' drum tech Flemming Larsen to fill in for him for the show/event. Replacing a bassist easy, a guitarist harder to do, a singer (which they did three years ago in Dallas) very difficult, having replacement drummers thats very difficult. Drummers are the back bone of the band and keep the beat. Good thing these guys from Slipknot and Slayer stepped up.



In other news

David Hasseloff, of Baywatch, Knight Rider and now Hip hop fame (his name in hip hop would be Hassel the Hoff according to Ice-T) has been arrested for suspision of driving under the influence. Here is the story.

I hear that the entire country of Germany has closed down today in grieving for its fallen hero.

Also a Madison Ave Ad Exec has said that the cam-pain commercial for both Bush and Kerry lack Pizzazz. Now I am sure we would all like to see Bush explain his foreign policy to the AFLAC duck (AFLAC!!) and maybe have Kerry tell his domestic growth plan to one of the screaming herbal essence ladies while rubbing shampoo in her hair, but I really don't think thats gonna happen. Besides these ad exec really only want as much flash and dash as possible and really don't care much for the substance of things. On a side note I do think the AFLAC duck could beat Bush in an IQ test and in pronouncing a lot of words. AFLAC!!!!!! Yep I do believe that the AFLAC duck is the new Where's the Beef lady. Smart and funny ducks whats next?

Questions, wonderments and observations

I stuck a small flash light up each nostril tonight just to see them bright red. I then went and looked at myself in the mirror.

I just finished watching LOTR:ROTK and I wonder this were Merry and Pippen lovers? How about Frodo and Sam? Ya know a little hobbit on hobbit monkey love as Mike Lyons would call it.

I followed a guy from Belmont to Platteville today and he had his left hand blinker on the whole way... ok not the whole way he shut it off at Avista then turned it back on at Wal Mart.

At work I had a lady try and convince me that we weren't broadcasting on the AM today. I told her that I could hear it then said that she didn't have her radio on.

(Background: When I answer the phone at work I answer it Queen Bee Radio W P V L) Another old lady called and asked what out call letters were. I told her and she said no your call letters. Again I told her and then she said in an exapirated tone, no where can I listen to your station, myself being kind of fed up with these type of people (the kind that need to be spoon fed info, don't know the right questions, and get pissed off at others for there stupidity) I said she could listen to us in her car or in her living room or kitchen maybe even the yard. She didn't quite get that and asked the right question this time asking what our stations numbers on the radio were. I told her and then she asked what number she could use to get a hold of some one. I told her the one you just called. Then she asked what station she could hear Bob Bodden on, again I told her. Then she hung up with out even a thank you. I hate old people.

Finally the Platteville Pool is open...wait sorry Platteville Aquatic Center see it has a slide thats why its and 'Aquatic Center' anyway pools open everybody in. If you work at QueenB during the summer you know the significance of said event.

PRESS RELEASE

This is just a press release to remind you that I am sending out press releases. For more information please see the prior press release.

Hey if governing bodies can do this so can I

PRESS RELEASE

This is a press release to inform everyone that I am not releasing press releases about my life. To sign up for this exclusive offer please contact me through 'comments' or my e-mail.

Sometimes I wonder...

So I was gonna meet Kyle at BW3 I was running a little late but was still going to be there just a little later. Well on my way to Madison I get pulled over by that big sign for Hi-Point Steak House county HHH the cop takes about 40 minutes to process me so now I am over and hour late. Thankfully the guy didn't give me a ticket. I was speeding yes but doing 70 in a 65 while people are passing is not really ticket worthy. So I get to Madison and take the broom street way to state street and I drive right threw a fucking red light. Didn't even notice until I am threw it. Shit shit shit. No cops but more importantly no cars coming the other way. So I get BW3 and shit I missed Kyle. I bought some wings anyway and decided to do some shopping, I picked up a pair of shorts at BIG and TALL, for a while it was just me in the shop as I didn't see any sales person then the sales person comes out and asks if I need any help. I said no and that I was just looking for some shorts. So I grabbed a pair and while trying on the shorts in a fitting room I hear a vacuum fire up and think nothing of it. So now I am standing in the changing room in my underwear and shirt when the changing room door opens and the vacuum comes in, she was as freaked out as I was and said sorry sorry and got out. Jeez, at least she knocked off a few bucks of the price. Then I headed to Westfield Comics. Damn if I had lots and lots of money. OH HO. Then its off to the West Side Target for some CDs. While stopped in the parking lot at a stop sign so people can walk infront of me in a cross walk some chick walks out while talking on her cell phone and looking in her bag she starts walking right at me and finally runs into my car while its stopped. She hit the hood of my car and said I should watch where I am going. Jeez madison.

Song of the Day: Godsmack "Running Blind"
Thought O' Day: Whats it like to be in a relationship?

WHAT IF WHAT IF

The Florida band Creed has broken up. CNN reports that the three of the original four members will create a new band. Mark Tremonti(Guitarist), Brian Marshall (bassist) and Scott Phillips (drums) are forming a new band with Myles Kennedy called After Bridge.

While I was at most a casual fan and enjoyed some of their music and actually own their CDs, I always had a kind of problem with how Scott Stapp always had his beliefs so far out front then would deny he had them.

Also with Scott Stapp no longer in a band it gives him plenty of time to his new project eating tons of Cherry Garcia and rounding into Hamms Form.

Thoughts from an old friend

So Bill Clinton is going on a book tour with his book "My Life" coming out June 22nd. No word as of yet if you get the soft cover if you can get it replaced with a hard cover with a purchase of Viagra. Also does Penthouse have exclusive rights to the book? Its a toss up when I last saw this many groupies the last Motley Crue Concert or Bob Dole's book signing.

An artist in New York City is using thinly sliced ham as art. This is the same guy who covered an NYC apartment in melted Mozzarella and called that art. Ya know I am all for the arts but when they are stupid like this it is just plain worthless. I guess his next logical step is bread maybe cause then he'd have the whole sandwich.

Mini-me, Vern Troyer, all 32 inches tall of him, is asking for an annulment from his wife a 6'2 model Genevieve Gowman. Ya know I hate it when midgets and tall women fight. If she is looking for some colsolation I am here for her. She is 74 inches tall more than twice his height, do ya think that some night she went to the fridge or a snack and either tripped over him or stubbed her toe on him? Ever heard about God's joke? Its where midgets aka little people are hung with impressivly long ummm ya know. If you are 32 inches tall you better be packing.

David Tidmarsh, a 14 year old from Indiana, won this years spelling bee by spelling "autochthonous." Congrats Dave now all the kids will be asking you how to spell every other word under the sun. David now joins the long list of luminairies to have won including, Ludacris, Big Boi, and Eminem. Bet ya didn't know that all three rappers are great spellers huh? Incase you are wondering autochthonous means indigenous which if your wondering what that means well its an adjective that means originating and living or occurring naturally in an area or environment. Yeah thats what I thought too.

Thanks enjoy PM5K.

VH1

Vh1 is showing a show right now about swingers. I find there to be something inherently wrong with that. But hey if its your thing have fun. I guess i am to much of a prude to understand it.

Song of the Day: Drowning Pool "Forget"
Thought O' Day: Does't being commited involve rubber rooms and long sleeve white coats?

I hate pity

So Tino feels for me.

Open letter to Tino:

Ya know Tino I actually feel for you. You bitch about the things you decided to do. You bitched about being the PD at WSUP when you damn well know that you didn't have to take that job. You bitch about your brother but then always need him to help you. Tino you need to stop and think that life isn't always gravy. There are things that you can not change. But when its your choice to do it then bitch about it thats just wrong. You most likely knew of the differences between UWP and Winona. Winona is more expensive. So of cource you are going to get more things. UWP is an engineering school, every one else gets shit. Yes the leadership up top at UWP is pretty worthless in places and has no clue how to run it. But every person I have talked to from different colleges; Bimigi, Morehead, UW-Madison, UWSP, UWW, Mankato, UWRF, UW-Milwaukee, even Yale, all say the same thing the 'leaders of the college were idiots and didn't know how to run a college.'

I will gladly pay taxes when it means that there are certain things for free in the community. Did you know that in SW Wisconsin almost no schools have their students pay to play? By that I mean some students have to pay to play sports or be involved in extracurricular activities. And even those that do the prices are never really to high. On the west side of Madison the last time I checked, parents had to pay over $200 an activity. That means that some student who may have wanted to go out for band, football, basketball, track and Mock Trial would have to have paid $1,000 just so that their kids could do these activities. Instead you have parents telling their child to pick one and only one and get really good at it. I would rather have well rounded individuals in life than specialists (until it comes to health care then they are fine). I will pay higher taxes to give more people oppertunity.

Yes Wisconsin has huge gas taxes but have you noticed we don't have any toll roads? Yes its an inconvience but they do a good job of up keep on the roads and of making the commute easier for people.

Tino, I like you, I considered you to be a great friend but you need to learn that when you make a choice you really aren't allowed to bitch about some of them. Life isn't peaches and cream and sunshine and puppy dogs. there are some things you have to deal with and overcome.

One thing I hate is people who pity or feel for me because they think they have things or are better than me. Don't act like your shit don't stink now that its in the Winona treatment center.

Sincerly
Chad Henneman.

PS: The way you tell it nothing good ever came out of Platteville. I thought maybe you met some good friends here and had a good time. But the way you make it sound Platteville took and took and never gave back.
end of letter
I may be an asshole, I may be opinionated, I may be to harsh, I may tell it like I see it too often, but one thing I will not do is blow smoke up your ass, and lie to make someone feel better. I am honest and some times mean. People need to stop being coddled and fed mistruths. To me you have to find the good in things and try yo not bash your past, because thats what makes you, your past, you learn you live, you understand.

Weird sex laws

Curtesy of Netscape.com

In Rhode Island, unmarried people can not have sex, if caught they are both fined $10. So do they have cops looking for people having sex and then after they are done do they ask for a marriage licence?

The only acceptable postion in Washington DC is Missionary any other sexual postion is illegal. Really and i thought those in DC only knew how to give it up the ass with out any lube.

In Egypt you can legally divorce someone by writing "I divorce you, I divorce you, I divorce you" Now that was easy but in the settlement does the wife get "I divorce you, I divo." Ya know thats a Muslim thing and they think we are messed up.

In Buckfield, Maine no taxi driver "will be allowed" to charge any fare to any passenger who gives the driver sexual favors in return for a ride home from a nightclub or other "establishment which serves alcoholic beverages" or any "place of business" selling licquer. Screw radio I am gonna move here and and drive a cab. Though I guess it gives new meaning to the tipping your cabbie.

In Helena MT it is illegal for women to dance on table in a saloon or bar UNLESS she is wearing at least 3 pounds 2 OZ of clothing. Ya know the fun thing about this law? Asking her to step out of the clothes so you can weigh them.

Its against the law in Willowdale OR to curse during sex. Like I had to worry about that. Beside we all know that men only say 'OHH GOD OHH GOD.'

It is illegal for a man and woman to have sex on the steps of a church after sundown in Birmingham England. There goes my honeymoon plans.

In Romboch VA it is illegal to engage in sexual activity with the lights on. This one kinda makes sence cause well who wants to see THAT with the lights on. I swear she was hot when I was drinking thats why the lights were on.

In Oxford OH it is illegal for a women to strip in front of a pitcure of man. Women were stripping infront of pictures of men? Were these life size cut outs to simulate an audience?

We go back to MT for this one, Bozemen has a law that bans all sexual activity between members of the opposite sex in the front yard of a home after sundown if they are nude. Good thing I always wear socks.

In the state of Washington it is illegal to have sex with a virgin under any circumstances. (including the wedding night) Shit I guess I am not vacationing in Washington.

Finally strippers in South Dakota must always wear socks. Yes we don't want their little feet to get cold.

OHH FUCK. you're supposed to say fore. OHH SHIT FORE!!!!

Went golfing today with Page. Stopped at Cole acres 1st but they were full up with reservatiosn so we went to Doolittles and got some eats. Then headed on over to Birchwood. Nice golf cource kinda hard but fun and the views on some holes is just amazing. I hit something like a 72. On nine holes. Yeah I am pretty freaking crappy, but its fun. I broke out some new golf balls that are supposed to make you hit it farther and straighter. Well it doesn't make you Tiger Woods but they did seem to be a bit better. Straighter anyway. I wonder what I could do if i had clubs that fit me and I took lessons. hmm. But ya know I won't get better going four times a year.

I bought the 5th season of Buffy the Vampire Slayer yesterday. I like the show not as much as I like Angel but its still very good. Smart, funning writing and Alison Hanigan is just plain smoking. So sweet looking. She pulls off the lesbian witch thing well.

Also on this vacation I might try for, I would like to get an old a photo done like the old west. No idea why I want one, I think its cause I want one where I am holding like six guns and smoking a cigar. Cause ya know I don't have enough of those photos around.

George Tenet resigned today. The head of the CIA, and they keep putting Dubya's name in the same sentence as intelligence and well shit I laugh at that. Bush and intelligence have no place in the same sentence.

Ya know I found myself so bored for a while today before golfing that I watched a bit of the spelling bee thing on ESPN2. God that sucked.

Song of the Day: Korn 'One' Live from MTV Icon
Thought O' Day: Ever clean something up and had more shit afterward than before?

Injustice ... ONLY IN AMERICA!!!!

Only in America can a crack pot cheat endorse a dumb as a bag of hammers president. Yes sir Don King is voting for Bush. If this don't scare away enough moderates nothing will. Heres the story.

I smells good

OK so maybe not, I smell of AXE body spray (good) and Raid: Wasp and Hornet killer(not so good). I had to spray a small wasp nest, and that shit started wafting back down on me and well, I guess it wasn't to healthy of me to be standing downwind of the spray. I was indeed standing in a cloud of the shit. I at least washed my hands before leaving.

I went in my car to the Belmont mound today and drove up to the tower, walked to the top and sat and there and watched the world go by. I spent about 90 minutes up there just looking and watching and sitting and standing and thinking and not caring. Its nice to do that once and a while. I think every one should have a relaxing place to go to become introspective.

So I am leaning toward a late July midweek excursion vacation. I am thinking of going some where where I can watch some minor league baseball games. Appleton, Wausau, or somewhere. Of cource I could just hold off on the minor league baseball thing and go to KC Chiefs training camp in RF. I think they are still there.

Song of the Day: Taproot 'Poem'
Thought O' Day: What would it be like to win the lottery?

Skin

Hamms has shaved his head.

Truly disturbing

I don't know about you but when I get my own place I am gonna get me some freaky looking clown stuff. Go here.

Ash Tray

Lava lamp

Would you?

Here is a question for any one who reads this blog.

Would you be willing to give up your free will to live in a perfect world where there is no hate, no problems, and all is good? You give up free will, the ability to make a choice, and just follow a supreme god-like leader, who infect eats people to keep the perfect world going. **EDIT** I forgot to add all your past problems are forgoten and you have no new ones either, so no worries about relationships, money or anything else. **EDIT** Yes this is an Angel story line but it seems to be an interesting question to deal with.

Just a question.